The Christian Dirty Word - Submission

Even among many Christians, this Biblical word is cringe-worthy, anxiety-inducing, and angering: submission. In the good US of A, where we pride ourselves on independence and rebellion, the word conjures an idea of cowering in the face of authority and accepting our fate. For women and feminists everywhere, the word brings to mind The Stepford Wives and living solely for our men's comfort and praise, pretending to be lesser beings.

Yet, invariably, although we may try to avoid it, someone will bring up this verse, usually twisting it for whatever purpose or point they're trying to make:

"Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything." Ephesians 5:22-33

We're lucky if they even mention that the verse afterwards is all about husbands loving their wives. Most of us hang, as if to a life raft, struggling to explain it's not what they think, trying to keep our heads above the water before we drown in their disgust at our beliefs.

How about this verse?

"Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God." Romans 13:1

How can you be a feminist if you believe in the same Bible that tells us women to subjugate ourselves to even abusive men? How do you reconcile being a patriotic American and also a doormat to corrupt leaders?

You can't, and you don't. Submission doesn't mean those things. Let's see what it means to God and His followers who wrote those words.

If anyone could be called a rebel against corrupt leaders, it would be God. If anyone could be called a feminist, it would be God. How do I know?

In the book of Exodus, God poured down wrath on a pharaoh who enslaved His people. In the book of Daniel, King Nebuchadnezzar and King Darius of Mede did many evil things to his subjects, but Daniel and his friends refused to compromise to their demands on matters of faith, refusing their food and refusing to bow down and worship a human. Jesus stormed into the temple courtyard, yelling, overturning tables, and driving people out with a whip because of greedy and hypocritical leaders. He stood up in innumerable public places and risked his life to teach radical ideas that ran counter to what religious and political leaders were teaching. He rebuked and challenged those leaders to their faces.

As concerns both the power of a female and facing a corrupt authority figure, consider the story of Esther. She became the wife of King Ahasuerus and queen of Persia. Secretly, she was a Jew, and she found out the king was to kill her people. There was a law that anyone who came before the king unbidden would be instantly killed. She wasn't bidden, but she came into his presence anyway to petition him for her people, thus becoming their hero at risk of her life.

Jesus had twelve main disciples, but many, many more followed his footsteps, including women. In His time, men were the only accepted students of Rabbis. However, Jesus taught women and accepted them in His travelling group of discipleship.

The stories of standing against corruption in leadership and illuminating the power of God's female followers are many if you take the time to find them.

Then, what on Earth does God mean when He says we must submit? I'll tell you that it doesn't mean what the world means by submit. The world is overrun by corruption, power-hungry authorities, and people of all kinds who will run you over if you display any weakness.

God is certainly not a doormat, so if He wants you to be just like Him, do you think He's asking you to be one?

So, what is submission to God? When in doubt, check out Jesus' actions:

"But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:44-45

A servant puts others before him/herself and respects those around them. Jesus displayed this when He washed His disciples' feet, an action only done by inferiors, not figures of authority.

"When he had finished washing their feet, he put on his clothes and returned to his place. 'Do you understand what I have done for you?' he asked them. 'You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you. Very truly I tell you, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.'" John 13:12-17

Do you understand? He expressed, with his actions, how to be submissive. It's interesting to note that submission shouldn't only come from inferiors but from leaders as well. Here's another verse:

"So the last will be first, and the first will be last." Matthew 20:16

As followers or "inferiors" must submit to authority, authority figures must serve those below them. When you refuse to submit, to serve each other, as if you were above it all, you make yourself more inferior than anyone actually considered below you. This is not the worldly view nor is it the view the world wishes you to see God.

Okay, so what about women submitting to their husbands? I believe it is the same in many ways. Both spouses should submit to one another in the sense that they serve one another. Otherwise, as the authority figure in the household (Yes, the husband is indeed considered the authority in the hierarchy of a marriage. Hang with me for a moment.), the husband is not a good leader if he doesn't know how to submit (see Jesus' quote above about first being last). As concerns a man's authority in a marriage, the institution of marriage is a God-created relationship. As humans, we are transient, easily straying, very distractible creatures. Marriage and family is a symbol of the trinity, the unity of the Father (husband), the Son (wife), and the Holy Spirit (children). As such, there is a component of hierarchy, but it means to portray the unity and inseparableness of the relationship of God, born in love and respect.

Let me add this as I feel compelled: The Father would never abuse Jesus nor the Holy Spirit. He is Love. A husband is supposed to be walking in the footsteps of Jesus in this respect. If a husband is abusive, the entire unit breaks down. Jesus died so we could live and lived so we could thrive in joy and freedom. I am under the strong belief that God would not want anyone to stay within a harmful environment. You can be respectful but strong, loving but leaving, forgiving but not forgetting. God loves you.

To submit to authority of any kind, you must understand that the ultimate authority is God. If any authority figure of any kind wishes for you to compromise your relationship with God, you are not only encouraged, you are under obligation to not obey or comply. As shown in the examples above and throughout the Bible, you are a servant to the King of Kings before all else. All of God's children in the Bible and history in general refused to compromise their submission to Him.

So, to wrap up, submission is all about love, honor, respect, and living as Jesus would. God was never a doormat nor was he a woman-hater. Jesus is a rebel against all corruption even if it came from authority figures, protesting in love while remaining loud and strong. He is a true feminist. Although God has had to spread His message in many clearly anti-feminist environments (in the past and present), His message has always been empowering to women. Women was, is, and has always been considered equal to men in value. Don't mix up the world's message with God's.


I initially planned to write a post about feminism and another separate one about marriage. However, I had to first write this one as confusion reigns when it comes to the concept of submission, and that concept is tied to both of those subjects. Stay tuned!